What happened when I got off social media
Hint: I wrote a lot more words
It’s been a tough week in the Dennard household. I won’t get into it, but let’s just say that I’m having an unexpected, kind of scary medical procedure today—and it just feels like a real cherry on top of what has been objectively one of the hardest years of my life.
But hey. C’est la vie, am I right?
Somehow, although 2023 was a year of constant family crises, I have written a lot of words.
Like, a lot.
On the one hand, I know much of this is thanks to the work of Becca Syme and finding my best writing alignment methods. I talked about this a year ago here—how I couldn’t wait to meet my deadlines so I could experiment with what I hoped would be a new way forward for me.
It was so successful. I will never work another way.
But the other reason this year has been a banner year for me was that I stopped focusing so much time and effort on self-promotion.
Let’s back up a year and a half, to the summer of 2022. Because I wanted to give The Luminaries the best shot possible in the marketplace, I put everything I had into self-promo—specifically on getting pre-orders for the book. I mean, I put in everything.
And watching all that time, energy, and budget fail to yield results made me vow I would never waste my time, energy, or budget again. Not only was I frustrated personally that I couldn’t convert people to a pre-order, no matter what I said or did or offered…
But I was upset at how much it hijacked my brain. I was consumed with desperation. Please buy my book! My career is on the line. PLEASE.
Well, it turns out no one really cares because…oh yeah. All authors are in the same boat. We’re all begging for pre-orders, when the truth is that people don’t pre-order in the same way they used it.1
I’m glad I learned that lesson the hard way because then I had the data to make a decision I think we all want to make but are too scared to commit to.
I quit social media.
Okay, okay. Admittedly, I didn’t delete my accounts or totally vanish. But I did remove all social apps from my phone, and I started checking in only occasionally via browser.
Right up until I started the #ChooseWithSooz, I would install IG every Wednesday morning to post a reel that my awesome buddy Callum (👋) would make.2 Then after posting, I’d delete the app.
People always laugh when I tell them this, but I cannot express to you how freeing it was. It was amazing. I had nothing to demand my brain space beyond my daughter and my writing. That was it. The choice every day of what to do with myself was binary: either I wrote my book or I took care of Cricket if she was home sick.
Once Cricket got really sick and my life turned into caring for her a lot more, then I then had to cut back on the Substack too. I still post, of courses, just not as often. From a financial angle, this hurt because the number of paid subscribers dropped dramatically.3
But again: the choice was binary. My time and empathic energy are finite. Cricket obviously takes priority, but if she is well enough to go to school on any given day, then I write. Period.
I also got back in the habit of waking up early, so then—even if Cricket had to stay home—I knew I’d gotten in at least 1000 words for the day. Or if not new words, then good brainstorming time.
The result? Well, I wrote more words in 2023 than I think I have ever written in a year. I wrote 135K in Witchlight.4 I wrote 45K in the third Luminaries book. I rewrote the first 100p of Screechers. I tackled rewriting the opening of Something Strange & Deadly5. I wrote ~60,000 words in three other other projects on my hard drive.
Oh, and let’s not forget the Substack! Even with cutting back in June, I have written at least 50,000 words here this year. And there’s also my
…AND there’s the #ChooseWithSooz too, which has now been running for a whopping 2.5 months (!).There are likely more projects I’m forgetting to mention here as well, because every 2-3 weeks I’d “find a new river”6 and let myself be creatively free. As soon as a project’s riverbed felt dry—like I was trying to dig my paddle into dirt—I’d jump to a new, full creative river and work on that project.
Most of the time, those rivers were either Witchlight or Luminaries. But sometimes, neither of those rivers were full enough to jump back into yet…hence working on other things while their rivers refilled.7
It has felt incredible. Again, part of that is because I am now “in alignment” for my creative brain.
But another big part was just not giving a shit about social media.
I know, I know: some of you are going to say, But it’s the only way to promote my books! I need to be online!
But…do you? Like, really, DO you? Go google “sales conversion rates for social media.” Go on. I’ll wait.
Well? I bet it’s a lower than you thought, isn’t it? I can tell you my own data matches the numbers, just from watching it here on this Substack. Only about 1.8% of subscribers have upgrade to paid, and only 2% of subscribers actually pre-ordered The Hunting Moon and submitted a receipt for free goodies.
While I’m deeply, deeply grateful for the people who do convert (omg, thank you forever), I would argue a writer’s time is always better spent actually writing.
Because you know what boosts sales more than anything else? Publishing a new book. Every time you add a new book to your roster, you’re 1) increasing your odds that this book might be The Book to break out, 2) you’re reminding retailer algorithms you exist, and 3) you’re drawing in new readers who will go explore your backlist.
But Sooz, if I’m not on social media, what else can I do?
I know, I know, my friend. Trust me: social media feels like you have some semblance of control in a completely uncontrollable industry. And for some of you, that sense of being in control is enough to outweigh all the space that social media takes up in your brain.
I understand that and support it.
But for the rest of us—which I’d argue is most of us—social media takes more than it ever gives. It fills our brains up, whether we want it to or not. Space that we all used to fill with story but now find occupied by likes and filters and comparison. (
recently talked about this too, and all my findings concur with hers.)And don't even get me started on the addictive, brain-trapping nature of the autoplay video—which is now what we’re all finding when we log onto any platform.8
I ain’t got space for that, y’all! I got books due and a child to keep alive. And I have my own health stuff now to contend with on top of it. I’d rather fall in love with my stories everyday than scroll or post or tap “like.”
Trust me: I know how hard it is to leave social media. That’s why I took baby steps. I deleted the apps (even the Substack and Discord apps!) but not my social accounts. And I’d be lying if I didn’t admit that my muscle memory kept scrolling around looking for the missing social icons—and that it took an embarrassingly long time to eliminate those neural pathways.
Worse, I started scrolling elsewhere—namely news sites became my new kryptonite. But that’s what the Freedom app is for.
I also started keeping a book open on my Kobo app at all times, so if I really needed something to do and just wanted to cradle my phone like Gollum with the Precious, then there it was. A book for reading.9
Lately, because I was letting IG stay on my phone for daily #ChooseWithSooz posts, I definitely started struggling again. The neural pathways reformed. My fingers found—without any conscious thought—the IG app and slung it open.
I hate it. I hate it so much. So now I’ve started to install/delete the app daily. I realize this sounds like a lot of work, but I promise, it isn’t. It takes maybe 1 minute to install and log back in each day. And <1 second to delete the app. It’s overall so much better that than letting Instagram hack my thoughts for 24 hours, 7 days a week.
Lest you think I totally hate social media, I would like to say: no. I do not. I love doing the #ChooseWithSooz. I LOVE my DenNerds Discord. I love interacting with readers and replying to tweets (lol, as if anyone still tweets). I love giving away sneak peeks and cut scenes and physical goodies on the
(which was really the one thing I consistently kept doing in the self-promo realm all year…because I really do love it. It never feels like a chore.)But in a year during which I had to make a choice between WRITING WORDS or BEING ONLINE when I wasn’t tending my daughter, the option became easy. I have books under contract, so that’s obviously where I had to focus my time.
And as a result, my creativity has absolutely blossomed. My personal life might’ve been (and still be) a real challenge, but my writing life has never felt more fulfilling.
On top of that, an unexpected result has been how very much I enjoyed my release and tour last month.
I think I had more fun than I have…possibly ever. I was relaxed, my expectations were low, and I just went out to meet readers. No desperation. No frustration. No feeling like I’d wasted time, energy, or budget, since I hadn’t. I was proud of the book I wrote, and now it was out there for the world to read. People might buy it, they might not. But I wasn’t going to worry about it.10
And that felt wonderful. 10/10 recommend.
Alright, I am writing this on a Tuesday, so I need to get back to drafting now! Cricket was well enough to go to school today, and this third Luminaries book won’t write itself.
Since it’s actually Friday at 9AM ET when you will get this in your inbox, then know that I’m currently getting my medical procedure done. I’m scared. I won’t lie. So please send me all your good vibes. I really need them.
All the love, friends.
💚 - Sooz
There has been a real behavioral shift in consumers, and I wish publishers and retailers would acknowledge this and adjust their expectations accordingly.
Don’t worry. I pay him for this absolutely awesome service to me!
Substack claims they don’t have an algorithm that rewards content, but I don’t buy it. When I was posting at their suggested rate of 3x week, I got tons of new subscribes and paid upgrades. When I pulled back to 1x a week or even 2x a week, my numbers flatlined. And when I had to shift to more like 1x every two weeks? Lol. Bye bye, growth!
Actually, I wrote WAY more than this. But I kept and rewrote what ended up at 135K in the book.
I’m not sure yet what I’ll do with the Something Strange & Deadly series now that the rights have reverted to me, but I do know I want to age it up and rewrite large portions!
I talk a lot more about “my rivers” in the video workshop I did for people who pre-ordered The Hunting Moon. That said, I will be offering that video as part of the upcoming Susan Dennard Writing Academy too! So you can learn more then.
I imagine it like glacial melt. My creative rivers are ephemeral, and they will run dry until glacial melt can fill them again. I have to wait and let that river rise, but while waiting, I can jump into a different river that’s already full. (Don’t worry: I don’t think most people would like working this way or want to! But it has been great for me.)
Including Substack now, apparently. YARGH.
Right now I’m reading a FASCINATING book called Clean by James Hamblin. Highly recommend! I never knew the history of soap could be so interesting.
You have expressed a truth most of us are afraid to admit. Love this simple line: "But for the rest of us—which I’d argue is most of us—social media takes more than it ever gives. " It's akin to the old metaphor about pencil sharpening before starting the big task. Now it would be checking email or scrolling. Not only do we feel social media time is essential for an author but it gives us a false sense of accomplishment. It doesn't have to be all or nothing, though. We should figure out what platforms work for us, if any, and perhaps stick with that on a schedule--not every single day. Have you read anything by Dan Blank of We Grow Media? He has wonderful newsletters chock full of wisdom and experience on how creatives can grow and effectively share their work in an organic and meaningful manner. The whole, "Buy my book!" doesn't work. Dan encourages (and shows you how) artists to build their tribe one by one. To make connections and give back to other creatives, to have real exchanges that matter. When people really know you, your story, they are more likely to buy your book, follow, subscribe.
This is such a great post! As a short story writer who has only had stories in other anthologies and ezines, I look around at what other writers who are friends or colleagues are doing, and I hear the same thing over and over again: the frustration of social media, the desire to leave social media, or they have left, and what the benefits are. It is some thing I have been wrestling with too. Right before Thanksgiving I left the formerly called Twitter and I have not missed it at all. I have also severely limited my time on other platforms, but there is this sense that the dopamine hit is real for scrolling. Thanks so much for sharing this! best of luck to you on your procedure and with your writing and your daughter!